Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Great Expectations

No, not the book, but my unrealistic mental picture of what Christmas should be like. I do it every year as an adult. I remember those childhood Christmases. Though far from "perfect", they were always a day that was much anticipated and thoroughly enjoyed. I don't know what it is exactly that I am expecting out of Christmas. Something more Martha Stewart-like? Maybe Little House On The Prairie? I can't quite figure it out. This year, being what it was, I felt more disappointed in myself then ever before. The gift-giving dwindled down to 4 people out of the so many, many that deserved a gift ( if not 2 or 3!) from me.
I try to step back from it a bit, now that it has mercifully passed. I try to appreciate something in Nature everyday, be it bright sun, snow or freezing cold. I feed the birds, savor the walk to the mailbox and admire the pine trees. Maybe it shouldn't be what I expect out of Christmas, but what Christmas expects of me. An open heart, a forgiving soul, a joyous spirit. A creative mind and busy hands. Gentle words and the abitlity to express them...out loud. Thankfulness for all I have and humbleness to accept what I can not change.

1 comment:

  1. Beautifully written... thought provoking, too...
    I hope 2010 brings good things for you!!